Anna Webber/Getty Images
Anna Webber/Getty Images

1. "Wait…what??"

2. "No!"

3. "Fuck no!"

4. " I just…I can't."

5. "Are you fucking serious?"

6. "………………….."

7. "This can't be happening. I refuse to believe this is happening."

8. "I need a shower. A long, cold, lonely shower. And a hug. And then another shower, but a hot one this time. And then it would be nice for someone to make me a milkshake."


9. "What the fuck just happened? No. I'm dead-ass. What the fuck just happened? Somebody tell me what the fuck just happened. I'm not leaving this theater until someone tells me what the fuck just happened. And then makes me a milkshake."

10. "I love my wife."

Damon Young is the editor-in-chief of VSB, a columnist for, and the author of What Doesn't Kill You Makes You Blacker (Ecco/HarperCollins)

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