Gerardo Mora/Getty Images

Bill Cosby actually said out his own actual mouth that he bought actual drugs to sedate actual women. Women he, in his own words, "wanted to have sex with." He also actually admitted out his own actual mouth that he gave the actual drugs to at least one actual woman. When you sedate a person before sleeping with them, they can no longer consent. Sex without consent is rape.

And he actually admitted all of this during an actual trial where he was being sued by an actual woman claiming that he also actually drugged and sexually assaulted her; a case he actually settled out of actual court.

Again, these things actually happened.

And I say this now because, unless you believe Bill Cosby's brain and balls were somehow infiltrated, corrupted, and programmed by The Man like Billy Dee in Undercover Brother, you cannot continue to believe there is some byzantine plot to disgrace the name of a 77-year-old man who no one (I repeat: NO ONE) was actively thinking about until the allegations started to avalanche last year. It is no longer possible for you to construct a convincing defense. To do so would be to leave the land of stark improbability and enter the sea of definite impossibility. Basically, you would be a crazy person.

There is no conspiracy here. No chicanery. Just a dirty and guilty old man letting everyone — including those who refuse to believe he's dirty and guilty — see his dirt and guilt.