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In the most meticulous display of bitchassness you may see this month, a frustrated husband made a spreadsheet with details of every time he asked his wife for sex and her excuses for saying no. Somehow, none of these excuses were “you’re a passive-aggressive assclown,” but the data sort of speaks for itself here. They ended up having sex three times over the course of the month and a half that he was collecting data, which is pretty amazing given how easy it is to find and watch good TV at any time. You have to love the thinking here—how could you say no to hard facts like this? Er, choice of words. In any event… We don’t imagine this has helped his case at all.

Roll Call is a daily collection of interesting news stories, articles, blogs, and thinkpieces, curated by Tonja Stidhum and Natalie Degraffinried. They both have big hair, but they are not the same person.