Let our next greatest achievement be realizing the dream of full equality for all of us ...

- Human Rights Campaign President, Alphonso David, as reported by Maiysha Kai -

Advertisement

I Can't Wait Until 16 Years From Now When Serena Williams's Baby Beats Maria Sharapova Too

Quinn Rooney/Getty Images
Quinn Rooney/Getty Images

If you think it's totally fucked up that Serena Williams would announce her pregnancy on the same day Maria Sharapova — the woman who still somehow out earns Serena in endorsements despite losing to her 18 consecutive times and getting exposed as a drug cheat — turned 30 (and, for the record, it totally, definitely, absolutely is fucked up, but oh well), just wait until 16 years from now if Serena has a daughter. And that daughter also becomes a prodigy, and enters the pro circuit at 15. And then faces Maria Sharapova, who's extending her career in an effort to break Martina Navratilova's record as the oldest player to win at Wimbledon (46). Imagine the headlines if Serena the Second beats Sharapova too.

Advertisement

"Sharapova Sonned By Mother And Daughter"

"Maybe Maria Might Beat The Granddaughter Or Niece Or Something One Day"

"Another Year, er, Decade, Another Loss To A Williams"

"Serena Junior Can't Drive Yet, But Can Surf On Maria's Tears"

Anyway, happy birthday Maria!

Damon Young is the editor-in-chief of VSB, a contributing opinion writer for The New York Times, and the author of What Doesn't Kill You Makes You Blacker (Ecco/HarperCollins)

Share This Story

Get our newsletter

DISCUSSION

So, I'm just gonna ask it. Is it a thing now for engaged couples to have babies? Quite a few celebs seem to do this. Like, if you are planning to get married anyway, why not get married once you find out you are preggers and announce the pregnancy afterwards? #confused

Side-note: This isn't a moral judgement. Just a common sense sort of question.