Michelle Obama Is The Best Thing About America

YouTube screenshot
YouTube screenshot

A few weeks from now, the country will decide if Donald Trump — a unabashed bigot, racist, misogynist, xenophobe, charlatan, and chickenhawk — will be our next President; the person we choose to be America's representative to the rest of the world; essentially the most important motherfucker on Earth.


He will probably (hopefully) lose the election. And those hopes are based on polls indicating that he'll receive roughly 45% of the vote (instead of 50 or 51) and that he'll lose a few crucial battleground states. While those numbers are reassuring, they're not particularly comforting. All they tell us is that we exist in a nation where forty five percent of the adults voting are either completely unbothered by his litany of fuckshit or (most likely) voting for him specifically because of it. Which ultimately means that almost half (half!) of the country wouldn't terribly mind if we  — and "we" in this context are "Black and brown people, women who don't look like Ivana or Melania, anyone who isn't Christian, anyone who isn't straight, and Lester Holt" — disappeared up the steps forever like Judy Winslow, never to be seen again. This isn't just Trump's America. It's America's America.

At the other end, of course, is Hillary Clinton; the Lisa Simpson of American politics; the human personification of an "Eh, I guess" emoji. These are our options. The world's rapiest vat of cheese wiz or a person whose most effective campaign strategy is "Yeah, I've done and said some fucked up shit. But at least I'm not a vat of rapey cheese whiz. Vote for me and not the cheese whiz, please!"

But, if you're feeling particularly down and dark about all of this; if 2016 has left you nearly devoid of hope and definitely depleted of fucks, remember that this is also the place that produced Michelle Obama. Watch her speech today (which starts at the 25 minute mark) and remember that she is our First Lady, and has been our First Lady for the last eight years. Know that the same land that grew Darth Cheeto somehow found a way to birth and cultivate her.

As we spend the next month stuck in the muck of the worst parts of America, be reminded that she, who she is and what she represents, is the best of it.

Damon Young is the editor-in-chief of VSB, a contributing opinion writer for The New York Times, and the author of What Doesn't Kill You Makes You Blacker (Ecco/HarperCollins)



A former First Lady can run for president. This doesn't have to really really be the end of Michelle's White House shining. She absolutely could get elected in Illinois of all places. Who knows maybe she'll run out of Hawaii just because pineapples.