@serenawilliams via Instagram

It hasn’t been a good couple of weeks for Darth Maria. Her memoir—the hilariously titled Unstoppable—has been roundly panned for Sharapova’s cluelessness and willingness to employ racially tinged language when reflecting on her one-sided rivalry with Serena Williams. Also, as many have articulated, naming her book Unstoppable when she’s best known for being stopped 18 consecutive times by said “rival” is like Steve Bannon titling his memoir The Beautiful Man Who Totally, Definitely Doesn’t Have Greyscale.

And today, as Serena introduced the world to Alexis Olympia Ohanian Jr.—her 2-week-old daughter—Sharapova has to deal with the torment of seeing the baby that’s gonna beat her ass, too, 16 years from now when they play each other.


When reached for comment, Sharapova first said no comment, then circled back and asked to be off the record and admitted that she saw the pictures this morning and that Alexis’s bright white blankie and cute little baby lips were intimidating her.