The 20 Whitest Things White People Say to Black People, Ranked

CNN screenshot
CNN screenshot

20. “Oh, you’re married?”

19. “Is that your hair?”

18. “I don’t see color.”

17. “Can you turn that down?”


15. “This section is reserved.”

14. “He doesn’t bite.”

13. “I voted for Obama.”

12. “Yeah, you’re black. But not like, black black.”

11. “If you can say it, why can’t I?”

10. “Where’s your manager?”

9. “You live in this neighborhood?”

8. “I’m calling human resources.”

7. “Do you need hot sauce with that?”

6. “Can I touch your hair?”

5. “Security!”

4. “My best friend is black.”

3. What about black-on-black crime?”

2. “I’m calling the police.”

1. “I don’t have a racist bone in my body.”

Damon Young is the editor-in-chief of VSB, a contributing opinion writer for The New York Times, and the author of What Doesn't Kill You Makes You Blacker (Ecco/HarperCollins)


You like basketball?

I just don’t get all the fuss BLM makes

He probably should not have <insert> and he wouldn’t have gotten shot

Did you grow up with your father in your life?

I have literally screamed at a cop and still didn’t get arrested

I got jungle fever

Africans sold slaves

My Irish ancestors were slaves too and it was worse for them

That’s expensive; are you sure you want that?

What do black people mean when they say/do......

Do you know Fred, that one black guy I knew in college?