Well, On The Bright Side, At Least "No Frauds" Is Proof That Nicki Minaj DOES Write Her Own Rhymes

Kevin Winter/Getty Images for BET
Kevin Winter/Getty Images for BET

Despite the claims of Remy Ma and many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many others, I've never subscribed to the belief that Nicki Minaj employs and relies on a cadre of ghostwriters to prop her up. Mainly because it's a claim that always seems to resurface whenever there's a popular female rapper who also makes no effort to hide her sex appeal. (See, Kim, Lil, Brown, Foxy, Trina, and even — gasp — Becky, Darth.) As if a woman can't be sexy and spit at the same time. And "No Frauds" — Nicki's aggressively underwhelming response to "SHEther" — should finally be the nail in that theory's coffin. Because its solid, concrete proof that she, in fact, writes her own rhymes. Because if she had a team of ghostwriters working around the clock for the past three weeks — brainstorming and burning the midnight oil — they definitely, absolutely, totally would have written something better than her 40-degree-day-ass verse in this 30-degree-day-ass song. (Also, the irony of an actor who regularly raps about "running up on niggas" and a Fisher Price: My Very First Gang Sign blood hopping on a track called "No Frauds" isn't lost on anyone. Young Mula. Baby.)

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And yes, I know Nas took months to respond to "The Takeover" with "Ether" and, based on that precedent, we shouldn't jab Nicki about it taking three whole weeks to respond. But that was in 2001, when niggas still used dial-up connections, AOL, and Ask Jeeves. Today, if a big news story breaks and you happen to write for The Washington Post or the New York Times or even VSB, you're expected to be able to produce 600-1000 solid and publishable words on it immediately. Not a day after it happens, but in an hour or two. We just have a different expectation of the immediacy of media. And, in 2017, three weeks is a long ass fucking time to wait for lukewarm basura.

Damon Young is the editor-in-chief of VSB, a contributing opinion writer for The New York Times, and the author of What Doesn't Kill You Makes You Blacker (Ecco/HarperCollins)

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DISCUSSION

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Jarret Ford

1) Optically - Remy drops SHether and Nicki responds by publicly arguing with Trey Songz, and sending angry texts to DJs and radio hosts. She completely avoids mentioning Remy's name. She tried to go with the sell more records jab, but the public slammed her….she deletes the post. Realizing she had no lane, she attempts to go with the unbothered approach but becomes a deflated booty meme.

2) Shot for Shot - SHether had blogs, celebs, the whole social media, etc. in a collective gasp. Nicki responds with a tepid water diss on a song with Drake and Wayne, and even references Back 2 Back, a grammy nominated diss track Drake directed at her then boyfriend Meek.

3) Aftermath - She drops wet her noodle records, sees the "meh" response, so she posts a long self-congratulatory IG post, name dropping celebs, calling her record a hit, and awkwardly rallying against plastic surgery shaming, while plastic surgery shaming. And turns the comments off.

Nicki - L L L